Just. Can't. Remember.

My BFF, Heather, just gave birth to her second baby last week.  A little girl and she is darling.  I mean, really, look at her. 

Heather's baby girl.... one day old.

Heather also has a 24 month old son, so she asked me how things went for me when I was nursing a new baby and keeping a toddler out of trouble.   (Gavin & Owen are 21-ish months apart.)

Huh.  I have absolutely no idea.  As in, if someone put a gun to my head telling me that I needed to answer the question correctly to save my life, not sure I would be able to do it.  Huh.  No idea.  Part of me says, that must mean it wasn't too bad?!?  And the other part of me says "it must have been horrible and God has allowed me to block out that phase of life."

I think this is God's way of the earth being filled - we simply don't remember how difficult some parts of life are.  At least that is my current theory.

Rolling with that theory, I'm really feeling like I should document a bit of this current phase of life.

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I know this phase of life goes by quickly (and oh so slowly all at the same time).  Mothers and grandmothers regularly tell me how much they loved the phase of life when then their children were little.  I agree with them.... there are so many things about little ones that I love: snuggles, cute sayings, innocent games, belly laughs that can't be replicated by someone over 35 pounds or so, story times, stroller rides, learning animal names & noises, new words, etc, etc.

And then there is the reality of daily life.  This post is not about venting, it is primarily meant for me to be able to look back and read when I (God willing) have 3 daughter-in-laws and a few grandchildren. When I am looking at their lives and thinking "I don't know why they think things are so hard!  I didn't even have the fancy pants robots that they have now to take care of everything for them.  My kids slept through the night at 2 weeks old, they NEVER acted like this, my house was clean AND I managed to grow my own garden, exercise, take my kids on play dates and educational experiences as well as volunteering in my church and the kid's school."

You see.... that is what I am going to think I remember.  But that is NOT reality.  Here is what the day ACTUALLY looks like.  (And let's start by clarifying that our boys are AWFUL at sleeping, my house is a disaster, etc, etc).

4:30am: O is awake and screaming for reasons unknown to anyone in our home.  E is upset and doesn't want to share a room with him anymore because it is annoying.  Marty and I are just at our wits end not knowing why he won't sleep.  Marty finally just gives up, taking Owen for an early morning walk.  Sweet - at least I get a bit more sleep.

5:45am:  G is awake and wants everyone to know.  He would also like assistance putting on his underpants and clothing.  He communicates this by coming to my side of the bed yelling "Mommy STOP SLEEPING.  Me want new underpants, please."  Glad he adds in that please part.

Owen.  On the table.  Again.

 From then until about 8am comes the early morning chaos.  Owen insists on pulling everything out of the cupboards and off of the counters while I attempt to make breakfast and prepare everyone for the day.  When I turn my back to do things like get myself a refill of coffee (stepping over the kids plates that have now been neatly arranged on the floor), Owen climbs on top of the table trying to steal food from his brothers.  Or opens the door to try and run out into the street, or pulls the laptop off the desk, or tears up/chews on the bills needing to be paid (true stories).  

In the midst of this chaos, Elijah attempts to patiently inform me that he is still hungry and wants more to eat.... while Gavin creates inedible masterpieces with his breakfast.... like mashed peanut butter banana and water all carefully constructed with his hands.... which leads to what we will call "intense disappointment" because his breakfast is inedible and his hands are sticky.

At this point in the day, I usually think.... on my goodness.... it is only 8am and I am pretty sure it feels like 5pm.  Is it time for Marty to get home from work yet?  We need to get out of this house!

There are, of course, plenty of good & sweet moments throughout the day.  This is just a glimpse into the reality of the things that I most likely won't remember.

I actually feel like I will remember some of the specifics:

Owen.  "Helping" me to un-fold the laundry I just folded. 

* kids throwing all the shoes down the stairs
* emptying books of shelves
* jumping off couches
* arguing and putting brothers in headlocks
* eating unidentified objects off the floor
* minor injuries

The part I think is impossible to catch or remember even with documenting it is just how all of those things can be happening AT ONCE.  How can E's favorite toy possibly be broken at the same time that the toddler peed all over the bathroom floor, the one year old is attempting to dive off the kitchen table AND the timer is beeping that I should pull dinner out of the oven?!?!?  And how can it be like that at multiple times throughout any given day?  Just typing the scenario made me tired.

Owen.  He falls asleep at lunch at lot these days.  Shocking, huh?

Gavin doesn't usually nap, but occasionally he will just crash.  Like this day last week in the stroller.

Hopefully I will remember these days.

I would like to be able to remember some of the chaos just so that I can be a blessing to other mom's when they are parenting young children.  To provide them with encouragement, coffee, a nap and possibly some funny stories.

And oh, how I wish I could bottle up a bit of those belly laughs from little boys.  Makes my heart hurt and tears well in my eyes knowing that these chaotic days will be gone before we know it.

Look at how grown up this kiddo is already!  It has gone by so fast!

Seriously.  Look at this sweet happy boy.  How could I ever forget this?

And this is the point where I add a sweet, innocent picture of Owen reminding me of just how sweet and precious he is.  But I can't find any pictures where he isn't either sleeping or getting into trouble.  With that realization I think there may be a theme to the chaos in our world.....